help

I had no idea the help I was about to uncover. I sat down with my husband’s homemade curry (I know right? I am so lucky – thanks Babe!) and my son’s iPod was sitting right there on the couch.

So I turned it on in an attempt to turn myself off. At least a little. Maybe just set myself on autopilot to detox from the post Thanksgiving shopping I braved earlier in the day.

I checked email.

None of my children were bothering me. No one was asking me questions. Sometimes I love technology. I know it is not always the best thing for my boys’ brains. I may simultaneously feel like a bad mom. I may pay the price later with overly-squirrelly boy energy.

But in the moment I feel a profound amount of relief and gratitude.

And because my children were all plugged in for the moment leaving me alone, I had time to chase some rabbit holes on email that mostly I avoid in an effort not to have hours of my time slip away into nothingness in the blink of an eye.

I read an interview that one of my friends did with another friend on their blogs. Leeana (www.gypsyink.com) is a talented author and Tina (www.winsomewren.blogspot.com) is a lifelong artist.

What I found was inspiration. Just enough to help me actually upload my last post. And then sit down to write some more. Sometimes help comes at just the right time, in just the right way.

What I was reminded of is how contagious creativity is. And while part of the reason my posting here has slowed is that life sped up; there is another element at play.

With the speeding up of life, I have found it harder to read my favorite blogs. I feel like I am just barely making enough time to write on my own blog.

And that is no good. Because creativity breeds creativity. If I want to be creative, write creatively, I have to make space to enjoy the creativity of others.

I was so encouraged by Tina’s “about” side bar. She is an advocate for creativity, and I love it. I need reminders of the importance of taking care of myself. Of nurturing the artist within. Of making space in my schedule and my heart for being creative.

I need reminders that it’s okay. That I am better for who I love when I have time doing what I love. And then I need to remind myself not to beat myself up for not having it all figured out.

Because life is often a dance. And when things like this happen – so serendipitous and perfectly timed – I am reminded to trust the dance of life even if I need help remembering the steps. 

Advertisements

choices

Why am I so drawn in by this young woman writing about budgeting? Let’s face it; budgeting is not the most riveting reading material. But I am completely giddy. And it is not because of the budgeting information.

There are a couple of blogs I read written by young, single girls out chasing their dreams of travel in the big, wide world. I so enjoy reading about their adventures. Sometimes I ask myself……why?

The natural answer would be jealousy. That would fit nicely. They are living the life I am not. Except jealousy is not it. Not because I am so evolved that I never, ever feel jealous of anyone or because jealousy is evil and I am perfect and would deny it even if I did feel jealous. But because I know in my gut when I find the answer to the why I search for behind my sub-conscious choices. And my gut says that’s not it.

Their writing is just as fun as they are, but there is something else that draws me to them. And when I read this post about budgeting for a nomadic life, I figure it out.

Much of life is choosing what I am going to do with what I have. And somehow budgeting makes that all so obvious and black and white when most of the time living it out seems murky and confusing.

I love these girls and their lives and their writing because they are choosing to live their dreams. And so am I. And those dreams are completely opposite of one another. And somehow, that is incredibly clarifying and energizing for me.

Because there are days, like Tuesday’s post, when I need to be reminded that I am home with my kids because I choose to be. Because as far back as I can remember, the one thing I desired most in life, the one thing I longed for was to raise a family with my husband and grow old together. And not just the picture on the Christmas card for other people to see. The real deal. A lifetime of love and life…together.

And sometimes living that out is different than I thought it was going to be. Harder. Trickier. Messier. But no less beautiful. And while I acknowledge living my particular dream requires my husband’s choices as well as my own, it is still the life I choose everyday.

And I remember all of that when seeing someone else making different choices and being just as fulfilled as I am. Their dreams are no more or less valuable. No more or less meaningful. Slightly more glamorous at times (which I think is so fun to read), but no more or less beautiful.

So thank you Kate McClafferty and Hilary Billings! May we all have magnificent adventures whether at home or traveling the world!