fight or flight

I read a post recently about birds and how they fall out of the nest to learn to fly. I learned that geese are different. They have to fight to fly, even when they have all the right feathers.

The writer was making the point that much of getting where we want and need to be in life is more of a fight than something we fall into. I’ve been thinking about that ever since.

You see I have a writer’s conference coming up this weekend. It is my first one and I am dying. Signing up for it felt like a leap of faith. Falling off a cliff to say, “Here I come writing world! Catch me!”

However, since then it has felt like a lot of work. Work that I have been completely energized by. For a person who never saw herself in a “career”, the fact that I am so jazzed and ambitious about this is a bit……foreign. But in a good way.

So I have been hammering out a book proposal, writing posts on the blog, ordering business cards (which I think are so beautiful I could about die), printing the pages I sent in for advanced reading appointments so I can make notes on them, figuring out what to wear, and my latest project is to practice in front of the mirror those few sentences I have to introduce myself and my writing and my book. Preparation. I don’t want to miss any opportunity because I didn’t do my best to prepare myself.

And all of this I have been doing while being a wife and a mom of three and making sure our home doesn’t completely fall apart in the meantime. It feels a bit like a fight.

Then last week I started to feel a tickle in my throat. After the first few days I figured it was something minor and would clear. But by today I am wondering if I have a sinus infection. I am prone to sinus infections. I went to the doctor today. No antibiotics yet, but if I get worse, they are only a phone call away.

This morning my oldest son woke up nauseous. So far no vomit. I am trying very hard not to envision what this weekend would look like if the stomach flu went screaming through my family.

So while signing up for the writer’s conference felt like a leap of faith, like jumping out of a tree, preparing and making it there is feeling much more like a fight, like a goose learning to fly. I think that’s a lot like life. There are leaps of faith and there are fights when learning to fly.

What are you fighting for and what leaps of faith are you taking? Certainly I am not the only one….